Frustration – “I’m no writer”

I’m only taking two courses this semester, science and an exit course.  With the rest of my time this summer, I was hoping to write.  I’ve had an idea for a story rolling around in my head for years, and nothing ever came from it.  I tried writing it for NaNoWriMo, and failed.

I’ve spent the last two weeks building up background story, characters, metaphysics, history…  but not writing.

I’ve tried to come up with an outline and come up with… squat.

I’m a fairly organized person.  I like having everything planned out before I start something.  But this… everyone keeps telling me “Just write..” “It’ll plan itself…” but I’m sorry, that’s just not how I work.  I’m struggling to figure out how to get from Point A to Point B in this story and coming up with nothing.  Am I just not cut out for this?

I originally set out to just write a short story, but with the vast quantity of source material I have to work with, it’s turning out to be a much larger project than I anticipated, and it’s getting pretty damned overwhelming.

I’ve been reading books, watching videos, trying to learn how other others do it.  I have pages of notes, suggestions on how I can accomplish this.  None of it is helping…

 

…maybe I’m just not a writer?